Having “The Talk” With Your Parent

There are at least three difficult conversations an adult child may have to have with a parent.  The first is when a parent wishes to discuss legal matters and final wishes.  The second is when it is necessary for the parent to stop driving.  The third is when a parent is no longer able to sufficiently care for him or herself on an independent basis.  Today, let’s focus on The Talk about assisted living.

You and your parent may be able to have this discussion as a natural part of planning ahead.  But few people ever wish to imagine a time when they cannot remain in their own homes, living independent lives much less discuss it.

The greater problem can arise when the subject has not been discussed at all and a life-altering event happens. An adult child is not always able to care for a parent, or for the parent to move to the child’s home.  Your parent may need to be moved to a nursing home Abbotsford.

Before a crisis situation forces you to make a decision, try to open the lines of communication now.  Experts on aging say that conversations that periodically include terms like “nursing home” and “assisted living” can actually help reduce some of the associated stress later on.

Another recommendation is to “Make it your problem instead of your parent’s problem.”  Express your concern to your parent instead of issuing a pronouncement about what should happen.   Your parent might unexpectedly agree to a proposed move if you share your deep concern over their safety and health. This type of conversation also conveys that you are an advocate for your parent’s well-being.

Your parent may absolutely refuse to even consider moving to a care home Abbotsford.  In this case experts advise that you back temporarily off from the conversation but look for other opportunities to discuss it at a not-too-later date.  A precipitating event such as a home injury or forgetting to pay bills may help your parent to understand the difficulty of remaining at home.

If the conversational door is opened, you and your parent might schedule visits to several of the nursing home Abbotsford facilities.  Together, you may discover the facility that will meet your parent’s short- and long-term needs.

There will be many steps to take before an actual move can be accomplished.  By having The Talk and laying a partnership-minded foundation before a need arises, you and your parent may be able to move through this life change with less stress.  Your parent may discover a new kind of life enjoyment at a care home Abbotsford and be thankful for the new partnership growing between you.