When your daughter tells you that she is pregnant, you are likely filled with a variety of emotions. You might feel angry at her for creating such a situation, or you may blame yourself for not providing the right education. No matter what your primary emotional response is, work with her and offer support.
Leave the Judgment behind
Upon hearing the news, you may immediately want to judge her choices. Regardless of what decisions she made, she is now pregnant, and that situation is the one that you should focus on. While you may need to have a talk about better birth control methods later, you cannot go back in time and change the fact that she became pregnant. Accepting the reality of the situation allows you to move forward.
Express Your Support
Even if you think your daughter knows that you support her, she may not fully recognize that fact unless you say it. Tell her that you are here to help her navigate the options and that you will guide her each step of the way.
Explore the Options
Right now, your daughter might not know what options are available to her. In the event that she does not want to raise the baby, companies like A Child’s Dream suggests considering adoption. That way, the baby has the opportunity to live a full life. Making sure that your daughter understand the terms of the adoption is imperative as you do not want her to regret the choice later.
Advocate for Autonomy
You might want to make all of the phone calls for your daughter. While offering some tangible support at certain points is okay, encourage her to have control of the situation. Ultimately, she is the one who has to make the decision, and you want to motivate her to take on an adult role.
While returning to your exact regular routine might prove impossible, try to retain as much normalcy as you can. Encourage your daughter to return to school and to spend time with her friends. If she plans to raise the baby, host her a baby shower, if she wants one, as you would if she had planned the pregnancy.
When you first hear that your daughter is pregnancy, you are likely to feel overwhelmed by emotions, especially if she is young and the baby’s father does not seem to be involved. As time goes on, you will adapt to the situation, especially if you follow some guidance.