Life is full of challenges. The sad truth is that we always try to make life more difficult than it actually is: we worry about what other people tell of us, we spend time with wrong people, we worry a lot about what we do not have, and we are sure that this is exactly what we need to become happy. The point is we think and worry much about those things in life that make this life too complicated. So did I, and it costed me too much nerves, health, good mood, time, and money.

You see, I am 26 at the moment, and I’ve started to think about the way I live lately. Sure, 26 is not a big number, but it is perfect for those people who want to start living in full, isn’t it? So, I just looked back to see the way I lived, the problems I worried about, the people I talked to and believed they were my friends, the things I considered very important and worried about not having them in my life, and just asked myself: is it exactly what I want to have and how I want to live the next 10-15 years at least? And you know what? I’ve found 7 things I would like to give up and forget about. Moreover, I strongly believe, that if all people stop doing such things and thinking of such problems today, they will become much more happier, and it will be much easier for them to live.

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Today I want to share these 7 things with you, and I hope my list will motivate some of you at least to change something in your life. Believe me, it is easier than the majority of us think.

1. I stopped worrying TOO much

We all have problems, and we all try to solve them. So, if you are able to solve a problem, what is the reason to worry about it then? I must admit that some of my problems paralyzed me in the past, and I could do nothing but think of them all the time. As a result, even a small problem did not let me enjoy my life. It is obvious, that I had to do something with that. My advice here is the following: relax! It does not mean that you should ignore your problems; just stop thinking of them as something able to destroy your life.

2. I stopped criticizing myself

I am a kind of perfectionist by nature, so, it was really difficult for me to do. But the moment came when I just realized that it was impossible to be perfect with EVERYTHING. Everyone makes mistakes, and they should not cause any emotional pain: if you neighbor speaks French better than you, it does not make you the biggest loser at once. And if you have made a mistake, there is no reason to criticize yourself as if you killed someone: just make a conclusion, and you will do it better next time.

3. I stopped giving up

Our life is full of challenges, and I used to give up at once I failed. I was afraid of trying one more time to achieve what I wanted. And I understand now, that it was my biggest mistake, because I had missed so much because of this fear. Sometimes you just need to try twice to get something, and the first and only fail is not the end of your life. Persevere if you want good things come to you.

4. I stopped trying to be someone I wasn’t

There will always be people whom you consider better, smarter, and more successful than you. There will always be people who earn more, who know something you don’t, and so on. Do not try being them! Sure, it is good when you admire someone and try to improve yourself to be like this person, but the main problem here is the fact you may forget about who you REALLY are. Do not lose yourself trying to be someone you are not actually are. Love yourself, be yourself, do not try being better than you are, and do not waste your energy on proving something to others. There will always be people who will love and respect a real you!

5. I stopped worrying about what other people thought of me

Oh yes, it was my biggest sin, and I was very difficult to stop doing it. You must confess, that many of us worry about what other people may think and what they may say. Such thoughts often brought me down… “What will they say if I wear this funny coat?”, “What will my neighbors think if I come home late at night?”, and so on and so forth. I could not handle a negative opinion about me, even if it came from people I did not know and would hardly meet again. Now I just try not to take such things too personally and care about some negative opinions. When someone says I am lazy or crazy, it does not mean he is right.

6. I stopped buying happiness

Many people believe that money can bring them happiness, and I was one of them actually. “If only I had a million of dollars, I would become happy at once! I would be able to buy a house, a car, good food and clothes. I would travel a lot!”. Does it sound familiar to any of you? Now I am trying to find happiness in common things and extract it from love, laugh, passion, my close friends, my family, my pet, etc. And I am trying not to cry about whether life is fair or not.

7. I stopped communicating with wrong people

I had one friend (well, I considered him my friend at least) who brought me nothing but complains about his life, his wife, his kids, etc. I supported him as much as I could, even when I tried to complain about something in my life and he did not even pay attention to it. He was like a vampire: I always felt exhausted after our talks, but always found excuses for him (he told that I was the only one to support him). My only attempt to disagree with his opinion ended with his hysterics. He deleted my contacts from Skype and all social media at once. This only moment made me think about people whom I communicate with, and about what both they and I give each other.

Do not surround you with personalities who do nothing but bring you down. They do not have ambitions, they do not want to develop themselves; they need you to complain, they often undermine your worth to feel themselves better. Life is too short to spend your time with such people. You need someone who will uplift you.

Now my plans are to learn saying “No” sometimes, and stop thinking of myself as someone who can always wait. It is my life, and I am the one who writes essays on it. It’s high time to take a pen, and not to let other people hold it for me.

By Alex Strike, a blogger of essay-all-stars.com, and a passionate short stories writer.