I wrote a tweet, that generated a lot of responses, about how we need to stop gendering our children and newborn babies. Most of the replies I received were positive, but some were confused and others made a joke about it. People as a whole are still ignorant about non conforming gender identities. They are afraid of us or they don’t even know we exist. Our society is beginning to validate trans-identities, even transgender children- as long as they are male to female or female to male, as long as they exist within the gender binary. This is a step in the right direction, but it is not good enough.
When I encounter a new person, perhaps a customer at work or someone at school, some individuals are shocked when I asked them to refer to me with gender neutral pronouns (They/Them) I often get confused for a woman and it makes me very angry. We as a species are evolving. The idea of male/female is outdated and scientifically inaccurate. The idea of having a variety of different genders to choose from is not new ‘tumblr’ genders, they are real and valid. Native Americans knew there was more than too genders. It’s only white western culture that tries to trap everyone in either a blue or a pink box. Millennials are simply more open minded and loving than previous generations, therefore people are more accepting if one is not come out as something other than male or female, so people feel more comfortable in doing so. That’s why our generation is considered the gayest generation- not because more people are not straight, but because people are more accepting.
Gender is a social construct
Being straight and cis is not ‘normal’. Most people believe themselves to be those things because we’ve been socially conditioned from birth. You’re just conforming. Gender is actually a spectrum. But don’t get it twisted: it’s not like you’re either male or female or somewhere in between. Gender is far more complicated than that. Non binary is a umbrella term. Someone who is non-binary isn’t always in between male and female, they can be something else entirely and their identity is completely valid. There are an infinite amount of potential genders, all of them, along with their corresponding pronouns are valid. Some places in the US, Canada, and the UK have made it illegal to intentionally mis-gender someone, including non-binary identities. Some preschools in said countries are even allowing young children to choose their gender, with options other than male or female. This is progress but we’re still seeing male/female being treated as the norm. We need more non-binary representation and acceptance from society. We must break free of this oppression of gender. But how?
We need to abolish the idea of gender all together
When you’re born, a doctor glances in between your legs and chooses your entire identity for you. It’s time to evolve, people. We should no longer gender newborn infants. You can refer to the child as ‘they’ or simply ‘baby’ until it is old enough to tell you it’s gender. It should wait until it can comprehend and then be given an educated choice with many different options. The child can change their gender through out life if they need to, or maybe they will be gender fluid and change their gender through out the day. We also need to erase the idea of straight being the norm, the idea that it’s a so-called man and woman who are meant to raise a family. We would be creating the most woke generation the world has ever seen. In a world where cis and straight are not the norm, there would be no more sexism and homophobia. This would also solve our problem of toxic masculinity- society would no longer be able to shrug it’s shoulders and say, “Boys will be boys”. People with penises and people with vaginas will be raised the same exact way. Our society currently is now still a rape culture an teaches male identifying humans that it’s okay to take advantage of those they preserve as females. We need to stand up to this.
There are still an overwhelmingly amount phobic people who are afraid of change, many would not be comfortable with raising children this way so it will have to be mandatory. People who don’t like it just shouldn’t have kids. The future is gender neutral, whether you like it or not. Which side of history do you want to be on?
If you already have children, it’s not too late. You can help them by explaining that gender and straightness is a social construct. Raise you child gender neutral. You can still let them choose who they want to be. Avoid media that showcases straight and cis as the norm. Tell them that they are the change that the world needs.
If you’re like me and don’t want to have children, you can still help this world by talking about non-binary, intersex, and trans identities, always asking a person their pronouns, and educating those you come in contact.